I went back to work today, and I have mixed feelings. On one hand, I am very blessed and thankful for the gift God has given me: this job. On the other hand, I am so behind and so overwhelmed with everything. My body hasn’t fully recovered, and my mind is on my mom.
In some ways, it was really nice to be back. My job is a gift, and it is a blessing in many ways. Once I fully recover, mind, body and soul, and figure out how to be available for my mom, work will come easier. I’m also reminding myself that I do the best I can with what I have to offer and not worry about the rest.
I’m thankful for all the hugs people wanted to give me, but unfortunately, when people hug me and I’m emotionally unstable, it makes me break down in uncontrollable tears.
I didn’t manage to photograph this, but Petronela had put some tulips in my vase, which made me feel loved. It was very thoughtful and caring of her.
I left work early today because I don’t know how my mom is handling the day without me as her emotional support. Depending on how she does today, I can then plan out the rest of my work weeks while she’s here.
I am trying not to cry on the train as I tell myself I am okay and I can do all the things God has put before me. Okay, I did cry. Holding it together at work or in front of my mom was hard, but I do it.
Now I am working through a headache with a cup of coffee and the Sophie Scarf.
